We’re celebrating the art of writing for the screen this week at Quotables, as we salute the efforts of the industrious participants in April’s annual Script Frenzy screenwriting challenge.

Script Frenzy is an international writing event – from the folks that brought you NaNoWriMo – which sets aspiring screenwriters the challenge of writing 100 pages of scripted material in just 30 days. To keep you going as you near the mid-way mark, we thought we’d assemble a collection of quotables to motivate and inspire you crazy scriptwriting fiends! From Robert McKee’s workshop guidance and William Goldman’s practical advice, to the wit and wisdom of loads of amazing screenwriters past and present – there’s a huge wealth of quotable goodness to get those creative juices flowing. So, get writing, and remember Raymond Chandler’s famous tip: “When in doubt have a man come through the door with a gun in his hand.”

1. Stories are the creative conversion of life itself into a more powerful, clearer, more meaningful experience. They are the currency of human contact.
— Robert McKee

2. And that’s the goal: writing that’s ALIVE.
— Chuck Close

3. Opening your imagination to the ridiculous opens your mind to what you’re not otherwise seeing. In other words, it makes room for the genius to come through.
— Beth Brandon

4. I don’t think you can get around it: good writing’s INSPIRED. Period.
— Chuck Mondry

5. When I was really young I didn’t know that there was such a thing as a screenwriter. I wrote stories.
— John Sayles

6. All good writing is swimming under water and holding your breath.
— F. Scott Fitzgerald

7. Write every day, line by line, page by page, hour by hour. Do this despite fear. For above all else, beyond imagination and skill, what the world asks of you is courage, courage to risk rejection, ridicule and failure. As you follow the quest for stories told with meaning and beauty, study thoughtfully but write boldly. Then, like the hero of the fable, your dance will dazzle the world.
— Robert McKee

8. What you are starting out with may not be exciting or interesting, but don’t let that deter you from embracing it and making it your own. There is wonder in all things, you just have to be willing to seek it. As my favorite author, G.K. Chesterton puts it “The world will never starve for want of wonders; but only for want of wonder.”
— Ethan Nicolle

9. If you want to write films become a writer director. Get yourself a video camera and construct your stories on film and go to film school. Go that route so that you are in control of your stories.
— William Nicholson

10. For the first time, I heard actors saying my lines and my partner’s lines, and it was – it was extremely thrilling because the kids — most of them — were too young to change them, so they were actually reading them as written, which was nice, and it hasn’t happened a lot since then.
— Paul Guay

11. Ideas can come from anywhere, they are the vital spark that starts the writing process. One of the best ways of deciding whether you’ve got a good idea fora movie is to ask yourself one simple question: “If someone else had written this story, would I get on a bus, go down to the cinema and pay to watch it?”
— David Griffith

12. Being a good writer is 3% talent, 97% not being distracted by the Internet.
— Anonymous

13. Good writers borrow from other writers. Great writers steal from them outright. — Aaron Sorkin

14. A structural approach to screenwriting requires patience and discipline, but the rewards are great. You might find if you spend three weeks hammering out your story, the actual screenwriting will take only a week.
— Greg Marcks

15. The best tip for writing is just to write; to sit down and write, to begin doing it and not to be scared by the blank page.
— David Almond

16. Think of the most obvious thing, then don’t do it: It is easy to fall in love with an idea because you thought of it, but often you thought of it because it was obvious. This is not a rule, only a wise practice. Sometimes you will find that the obvious choice was the best choice, so in that case do the obvious thing, but not in an obvious way.
— Ethan Nicolle

17. Not using dialogue can give a character an extra layer of personality. Think about the people in your life and their body language, the quirks they have and how it helps define what you think of them. One defeated shrug can speak to a character’s entire philosophy of life… You’ve got the power to make your actors do anything you want, so use the hell out of that imagination.
— Curt Franklin

18. So much of good comedy comes out of strong, vivid character ideas. Creating two unique characters an audience will fall in love with and need to see united is the most important key to your screenplay’s success. All great characters have purpose and credibility, are empathic and complex.
— Billy Mernit

19. There’s absolutely no reason you can’t write in ANY genre if you are prepared to put the work in. Genre is craft. Craft can be learnt. So learn the conventions of the genre you want to write. Watch all the movies in that genre, big and small; read all the scripts. Go to events, learn about it. Read articles, blogs, soak it all up.
— Lucy Vee

20. When in doubt have a man come through the door with a gun in his hand.
— Raymond Chandler

21. You may have a set, a setting, world, or a physical comedy opportunity that will open up and enliven your movie. Annie Hall takes place in a fairly mundane urban world, but it’s packed with sight gags, from the cocaine sneeze to the errant lobsters, and inventive visual ideas, from split screen to animation. Make sure your script makes use of all the cinematic storytelling techniques a good movie-movie uses.
— Billy Merfit

22. Once you’ve got your character – who by then hopefully has a name – what often helps is to do some daydreaming.
— Alan Swyer

23. I love fantasy. I love horror. I love musicals. Whatever doesn’t really happen in life is what I’m interested in. As a way of commenting on everything that does happen in life, because ultimately the only thing I’m really interested in is people.
— Joss Whedon

24. Think of story as the plan and screenplay as the execution. A screenplay is a story told in scenes, each scene necessary to tell the story. At this stage you’re just testing if each scene is necessary. When planning a screenplay, I try to write the story in prose first, without dialog, with each scene represented by either a sentence or a paragraph. Then I read and revise the condensed story, omitting what is unnecessary.
— Greg Marcks

25. That’s the hard part – writing is all about the preservation of your own voice. So if you give that voice away by guessing what you think and you think and you think as you go, you’ll have less to say and then it’ll go away completely!
— Gary Ross

26. Lacking inspiration, I tried to take CONFIDENCE from adhering to “classical” dramatic form. And my writing just died.

— Chuck Mondry

27. Close the door. Write with no one looking over your shoulder. Don’t try to figure out what other people want to hear from you; figure out what you have to say. It’s the one and only thing you have to offer.
— Barbara Kingsolver

28. When talented people write badly, it’s generally for one of two reasons: Either they’re blinded by an idea they feel compelled to prove of they’re driven by an emotion they must express. When talented people write well, it is generally for this reason: They’re moved by a desire to touch the audience.
— Robert McKee

29. We’ve all been burned by bad feedback. Rude, insensitive, bossy, arrogant, wrong-headed, cruel even.
— Julie Gray

30. I’m not very comfortable giving advice to other writers. Writing just doesn’t come easy for me. Actually, it’s pretty much constant FAILURE.
— Chuck Mondry

31. Writers awaiting feedback are in a very vulnerable position. Yes, yes, we have to have thick skin but writers are sensitive, let’s face it. This is not a new toilet we have installed; our stories are our hearts.
— Julie Gray

32. Every writer I know has trouble writing.
— Joseph Heller

33. I think living with all that failure makes us vulnerable. It makes us weak. And it explains why all those goddamn screenwriting books fill the bookstores. Don’t be fooled, friends. They can’t save you.
— Chuck Mondry

34. Put yourself in the other person’s shoes. You put your heart and soul into the script, for months and weeks. And now somebody is going to pass judgment.
— Julie Gray

35. Screenwriting is no more complicated than old French torture chambers, I think. It’s about as simple as that.
— James L. Brooks

36. We don’t give feedback to be right or superior or better. We do it to be constructive and productive. Given, I do this every single day; it’s my day job. So I’m pretty good at it. But if this is not normal for you, reading a script and giving notes, just remember to give feedback in the same way you’d want to receive it.
— Julie Gray

37. What was it Nietzsche said? That which does not kill us makes us… well, depressed.
— Chuck Mondry

38. Good feedback is kind, thorough and timely. It’s professional and focused. It leaves the writer feeling challenged to do better but great about their strengths. Even if that just means the location they chose was cool. Give your feedback relative to the skill set of the writer. Never lie or obfuscate. Just serve it up gently. An upset writer isn’t going to hear your points anyway. But an encouraged one will. Trust me on this.
— Julie Gray

39. I don’t believe in writer’s block. I don’t know what that is. There are just certain little areas that I know I’m going to get through. It’s just a matter of finding a way.
— Elmore Leonard

40. Film’s thought of as a director’s medium because the director creates the end product that appears on the screen. It’s that stupid auteur theory again, that the director is the author of the film. But what does the director shoot—the telephone book? Writers became much more important when sound came in, but they’ve had to put up a valiant fight to get the credit they deserve.
— Billy Wilder

41. So the writer is the only person who’s taking absolutely nothing, and 120 pages of it, and dirtying it up in such a way that it’s gonna gross hundreds of millions of dollars and make a lot of people happy.
— Paul Guay

42. The first screenplay I ever sold was something I’d written with Chris Matheson, my sometimes writing partner. It was Bill & Ted’s Excellent Adventure. And we had a meeting with a director who had some really lame ideas. And Chris and I said, ‘I don’t think that would really work.’ And this director said, ‘Well, if you don’t think that’s a good idea, we’ll find some writers who do think it’s a good idea.’
— Ed Solomon

43. The screenplay is the child not only of its mother, the silent film, but also of its father, the drama.
— Terrence Rattigan

44. There was a great director who directed a picture that I wrote who barred me from the set—quite appropriately—and said, “I’m sorry, Jim. When you’re directing, you don’t need to know everything. You need the illusion that you do.” And, you know, and I WOULD be there—behind him trying to signal the actors in, you know, in a way I wasn’t even aware of.
— James L. Brooks

45. Well, Jack Warner may have been celebrated for calling writers “Schmucks with Underwoods,” but 20 years earlier Irving Thalberg … said, “The most important person in the motion picture process is the writer, and we must do everything in our power to prevent them from ever realizing it.”
— Steven De Souza

46. You have no idea that years later, people in cars will recognize you on the street and shout, ‘You talkin’ to me?’ I don’t remember the original script, but I don’t think the line was in it. We improvised. For some reason it touched a nerve. That happens.
— Robert De Niro

47. Speed is crucial in TV. Under the pressure of production, you have to be able to bang out good scripts on a clock. A writer who can finish a solid draft in two months? They’re easy to find. I’m interested in the writer who can write that draft in two days.
— Matt Nix

48. Writing is finally about one thing: going into a room alone and doing it. Putting words on paper that have never been there in quite that way before. And although you are physically by yourself, the haunting Demon never leaves you – the knowledge of your own terrible limitations, your hopeless inadequacy, the impossibility of ever getting it right. No matter how diamond-bright your ideas are dancing in your brain, on paper they are earthbound.
— William Goldman

49. Screenwriting is an opportunity to fly first class, be treated like a celebrity, sit around the pool and be betrayed.
— Ian McEwan

50. Now. What are you doing still reading this? You’ve got writing to do!
— Beth Brandon

USA Film Releases | Friday 8th March 2011

Welcome back, neighbours-to-the-west! The Quotables Review has returned. This week the jolly Russell Brand hits screens in Arthur, surfer-chic meets spirituality in Soul Surfer, Your Highness rollicks in the medieval mud, and Joe Wright takes a new direction with assassin-style Hanna. Can’t decide what to watch? The Quotables Review is here to help! Here’s a round-up of some of the best reviews on this week’s cinematic offerings.

Arthur

Russell Brand stars in the remake of Arthur, taking on Dudley Moore’s boisterous billionaire  the brink of an arranged marriage to a wealthy heiress but ends up falling for a common working class girl instead.

Russell Brand doesn’t exactly improve on Moore’s playboy billionaire so much as convert the character’s tragic immaturity into alcoholic toxicity. Brand, already a Dionysian visual joke of swirling hair and rock-star poses, is always funnier when saying less. Too bad he’s got a lot to convey here; he comes off as more of a match to his narcissistic arranged bride, Susan (Jennifer Garner), than must have been intended.
— Joshua Rothkopf, Time Out

Brand shares a British heritage with Moore, but his comedy is much different. The guy is a talent, no doubt. Only last week, he put an undeniable comic jolt into Universal’s animation/live-action mix Hop. But there is edginess to Brand’s humor, even an aggressiveness. His Arthur creates scenes, not laughs. He’s a pathetic, bratty little boy who refuses to grow up rather than a genial alcoholic who wouldn’t harm a fly.
— Kirk Honeycutt, The Hollywood Reporter

Soul Surfer

A teenage surfer girl summons the courage to go back into the ocean after losing an arm in a shark attack.

McNamara tries to connect “the energy of the ocean” and Bethany’s relationship with religion, but neither feels at all earned or engagingly fleshed out. Soul Surfer just sits there lifeless on a numbingly bland narrative template, waiting for a big wave of originality to validate its existence. That creative infusion never comes.
— Glenn Heath Jr., Slant Magazine

Nearly every conflict is built on market-tested platitudes of empowerment and registers as insincere, especially a spurious re-creation of Bethany’s visit to Thailand to aid tsunami victims. Congratulations, Holly-wood, for commissioning your own modern parable about a strained family questioning their faith… Young Ms. Hamilton’s story is inspiring, but if you need it spoon-fed by American Idol winner Carrie Underwood’s youth-group leader, you’re better off lost and godless.
— Aaron Hillis, Village Voice

Your Highness

From the team of Pineapple Express, Your Highness’ royal brothers Fabious (James Franco) and Thadeous (Danny McBride) embark on a quest to save the Fabious’s fiance Belladonna (Zooey Deschanel) from capture. On their quest, they meet vengeful archer Isabel (Natalie Portman) and encounter great beasts and villains along the way.

It may be that “Your Highness,” a self-conscious, sometimes overly self-satisfied goof about ye olde high times, may be better enjoyed in an herb-enhanced condition. Getting stoned is, after all, a running joke in this comedy, which is as thin as rolling paper and just as ephemeral… Conjoined laughing and groaning is often the point when jokes are calibrated to go up (or down) with smoke.
— Monohla Dargis, New York Times

“Your Highness” is a juvenile excrescence that feels like the work of 11-year-old boys in love with dungeons, dragons, warrior women, pot, boobs and four-letter words… I hate it when that happens.
— Roger Ebert, Chicago Sun-Times

Pick of the Week: Hanna

But while there’s always a lot going on, and none of it uninteresting or dull, pervading the enterprise is the distinct feeling that Wright is trying to prove something — that he’s a real filmmaker and not just a literary transcriber, that style may not just enrich but trump substance, that perhaps a genre film is only really worth doing if it’s piled with loftier ideas.
— Todd McCarthy, Hollywood Reporter

“Hanna” is quite the improper little package, stylish, rich in singular images and one that carries itself with both the bravado of a spy thriller and the winsomeness of a fairy tale… Given its fantastic elements, “Hanna” is, on a certain level, ridiculous. But the way Mr. Wright conjures his images and parcels out his narrative is hypnotic and so seductive that wherever the film is heading we want to follow.
— John Anderson, Wall Street Journal

In Britain? Check out The Quotables Review UK edition!

UK Film Releases | Friday 8th March 2011

After a bumper week of box-office releases last week, there are only 3 major releases this weekend: The Roommate, and animated features Mars Needs Moms and Rio. Last week’s films will also be screening at most cinemas, so don’t forget to check out last week’s Quotables Review to see what’s out.

The Roommate

Gossip Girl’s Leighton Meester stars alongside Minka Kelly in this dramatic thriller. College student Rebecca finds that her roommate Sara has a bit of an obsession, and she’s the subject of her “enthusiastic” affections.

Covering tediously familiar territory, this is only enlivened by the appearance of Billy Zane’s fashion guru in a grey check tam-o-shanter declaring his love of Yves Saint Laurent… File under guilty pleasure.
— Tim Evans, Sky Movies

This premise would normally lead to all sorts of exploitation movie mayhem, but in the hands of Danish director Christian E Christiansen, it becomes a bloodless, charmless bore.Cat lovers may be unnerved, but fright fans will just yawn their way to the exit.
— Ken McIntyre, Total Film

Mars Needs Moms

In Disney’s latest 3D animation, a young boy named Milo gains a deeper appreciation for his mother after Martians come to earth to abduct her. Leaving his chores behind, he takes off on an adventure to save his Mom.

The skill level of this motion capture animation is getting better all the time. So Mars is accomplished at every level. But the three most important things in movies are story, story, story so the movie never comes off as the considerable achievement it truly is.
— Kirk Honeycutt, Hollywood Reporter

As the various forces convene, building up to a climactic battle sequence, the plot’s preposterousness becomes irrelevant; its primary goal, at this point, is to deliver thrills…. On a technical level, “Mars Needs Moms” is well assembled and proficiently directed. Production design, however, appears to be such a pastiche of sci-fi classics that one can only hope it’s intended as homage.
— Lael Loewenstein, Variety

Pick of the Week: Rio

Midwestern Macaw Blu is a happily owned parrot residing in small-town. When his owner, Linda, discovers he’s not the last of his kind, they head Tio to Blu’s female counterpart, Jewel. After arriving, Blu and Jewel are kidnapped by animal smugglers. Animal antics ensue.

Disliking Rio would take an immense amount of will. It’s generic – given just a list of character descriptions, you could probably lay out a rather accurate sketch of the plot. But it’s made with so much verve, voiced so charmingly, and with such tropical colour daubed excitedly into every inch of the screen that stimulation is not optional.
— Olly Richards, Empire

In the film’s favour, the 3D is crisp, richly realised and endowed with exquisite depth of field. But all that eye-candy counts for little when the jokes fall flat, the Latino songs lack lustre and the script is so ineffectual. ‘Rio’ isn’t totally devoid of merit – it could just do with a lot more zip and zing in its tail feathers.
— Derek Adams, Time Out

What are you off to see this weekend?

One of the most popular requests we get from Quotables users is for a daily quote service by email. Well, we listened folks, and we’re delighted to be launching The Daily Quotable – pinging a bitesized nugget of inspiration to your inbox every day!

Simply sign up here, or use the form below, to receive a quote a day cherry-picked by the Quotables team. We’ll be serving up a mix of the most loved quotes of each week, plus themed quotes to celebrate holidays and special events, and we’ll be asking some guest quote-lovers to hand-pick their own favourite quotables from time to time as well.

For now, we’re keeping things simple: you’ll receive your daily dose at noon GMT, in plain-text format, with the option of clicking through to a beautiful, shareable e-card of the quote, created using our Quoto service. (you can send your own free e-cards at Quoto anytime you like!) They look a bit like this…

In the future, we may introduce more personalised options, so that you can pick a theme for your daily quotables – such as motivational, or funny – or select a time to suit your timezone, or even receive daily email reminders of your own favourite quotes from your Loved List. Let us know if you would be interested in using these kinds of features by sending an email our way, or leaving a comment below.

For now, all you need to do is sign up to The Daily Quotable list to be subscribed – you don’t even have to be a member of Quotables!

Remember, we’ll never spam or share your details, and we welcome all your suggestions for ways we can improve our services.

It’s ill taking the breeks aff a wild Highlandman.
— Sir Walter Scott

Happy Tartan Day! As you may know, Quotables HQ is based in Glasgow, the largest city in bonnie Scotland. Today, we commemorate the signing of the Declaration of Arbroath – that’s our independence, don’t you know? – way back in 1320. Tartan Day in its current form originated in Canada, and has since spread across the diaspora like a lovely plaid blanket. Our pals in far off places are dedicated to their Scottish roots: an estimated 4.7 million (15.1%!) Canadians claim Scottish descent, along with 3 million Australians, and around 6 million Americans. There are tonnes of great events on in Scotland, NYC has an entire Tartan Week!

Wherever you are, we welcome you to indulge in some classic Scottish quotables for Tartan Day!

Fictional Scots

Off you go, you small boys.
— Chic Murray

There is nary an animal alive that can outrun a greased Scotsman.
— Groundskeeper Willie

This isn’t a skirt! It’s a kilt! And I’m not a girl!
— Groundskeeper Willie

Scottish Wisdom

Whatever you can do, or dream you can do, begin it. Boldness has genius, power, and magic in it. Begin it now.
— W.H. Murray

Be happy while you’re living, for you’re a long time dead.
— Scottish Proverb

They talk of my drinking but never my thirst.
—Scottish Proverb

There never came a hearty fart out o’ a wren’s arse.
— Scottish Proverb

Nae man can tether time or tide.
— Robert Burns

Sooner or later everyone sits down to a banquet of consequences.
— Robert Louis Stevenson

I find it useful to remember, everyone lives by selling something.
— Robert Louis Stevenson

Compromise is the best and cheapest lawyer.
— Robert Louis Stevenson

Scots Language

In Scotland we live between and across languages.
— Robert Crawford

Scots is English in its underwear. It’s difficult to be pretentious in a language like that.
— William McIlvanney

Scottish Ambition

There are few more impressive sights in the world than a Scotsman on the make.
— J. M. Barrie

The best laid schemes o’ mice and menGang aft a-gley.
— Robert Burns

Scotland, land of the omnipotent No.
— Alan Bold

I’ve always been told I was either too tall or too short, too Scottish or too Irish, too young, too old.
— Sean Connery

An Outsider’s Perspective

We look to Scotland for all our ideas of civilisation.
— Voltaire

It is never difficult to distinguish between a Scotsman with a grievance and a ray of sunshine.
— P. G. Wodehouse

My theory is that all of Scottish cuisine is based on a dare.
— Mike Myers

Today is the 103rd birthday of the incomparable Bette Davis – as formidable, headstrong, fiery and mesmerising onscreen as she was in her private life. One of the biggest stars of her generation, Davis garnered ten Academy Awards nominations, racked up four husbands, and provided the gossip columnists with reams of gleeful coverage of her long-standing feud with fellow mega-star Joan Crawford.

With those enormous eyes, throaty laugh, and imperious lip-curl, Davis was a complete one-off. As unforgettable tearily smoking her way through the last lines of Now, Voyager, or swaggering across the screen in the sublime All About Eve as fading star Margo Channing – equal parts acid-tongued chutzpah and brittle-edged pathos.

Below, we’ve gathered together a clutch of our favourite Davis quotes, but there are dozens more – add your own favourites to Quotables and help us create the most complete collection online. But first, over to Bette as Margo Channing – the lady knows how to say a line.

Fasten your seatbelts, it’s going to be a bumpy night!
— Bette Davis as Margo, All About Eve

From the moment I was six I felt sexy. And let me tell you it was hell, sheer hell, waiting to do something about it.
— Bette Davis

My passions were all gathered together like fingers that made a fist. Drive is considered aggression today; I knew it then as purpose.
— Bette Davis

I love my profession. I would never stop. Relax? I relax when I work. It’s my life.
— Bette Davis

‘In the beginning was the Word,’ and you must not be tempted with a script just because you have a great part. You want a great role to play, but the whole – the whole – must be good. It’ll never succeed if it’s just the role you like.
— Bette Davis

Attempt the impossible in order to improve your work.
— Bette Davis

Brought up to respect the conventions, love had to end in marriage. I’m afraid it did.
— Bette Davis

Discipline is a symbol of caring to a child. Discipline is guidance. If there is love, there is no such thing as being too tough with a child.
— Bette Davis

When a man gives his opinion, he’s a man. When a woman gives her opinion, she’s a bitch.
— Bette Davis

You will never be happier than you expect. To change your happiness, change your expectation.
— Bette Davis

Old age ain’t no place for sissies.
— Bette Davis

Yes, this is Sunset Boulevard, Los Angeles, California. It’s about five o’clock in the morning. That’s the Homicide Squad – complete with detectives and newspapermen. A murder has been reported from one of those great big houses in the ten thousand block. You’ll read about it in the late editions, I’m sure…
— Joe Gillis, Sunset Boulevard

On this day in 1850, Los Angeles, California was incorporated as a city. The home of Hollywood, the film industry, Rodeo Drive and Beverly Hills, the “Creative Capital of the World” is one of the world’s most diverse cities, home to people from more than 140 countries speaking 224 different identified languages. It’s the world’s 12th most populous city, and today is the 161st anniversary of its cityhood.

Love it or hate it, we’re warming up for Angeleno Bette Davis‘ birthday spectacular tomorrow with our Top 15 Quotes about Los Angeles. Hooray for Hollywood!

A big hard-boiled city with no more personality than a paper cup.
— Raymond Chandler

Tip the world over on its side and everything loose will land in Los Angeles.
— Frank Lloyd Wright

Los Angeles is 72 suburbs in search of a city.
— Dorothy Parker

In Los Angeles, by the time you’re 35, you’re older than most of the buildings.
— Delia Ephron

I love Thanksgiving turkey. It’s the only time in Los Angeles that you see natural breasts.
— Arnold Schwarzenegger

Fall is my favorite season in Los Angeles, watching the birds change color and fall from the trees.
— David Letterman

I love Los Angeles. I love Hollywood. They’re beautiful. Everybody’s plastic – but I love plastic. I want to be plastic.
— Andy Warhol

If a tidal wave hits LA, just grab a fake boob for safety.
— Sarah Michelle Gellar

People are afraid to merge on freeways in Los Angeles.
— Bret Easton Ellis

Los Angeles is just New York lying down.
— Quentin Crisp

I love Los Angeles. It reinvents itself every two days.
— Billy Connolly

I’m getting a full ride to the University of Los Angeles. Maybe you’ve heard of it. It’s in Los Angeles.
— Jesse St-James

If Iowa is the ‘heart’ land, what part of the human body is Los Angeles?
— Pat Paulson

People cut themselves off from their ties of the old life when they come to Los Angeles. They are looking for a place where they can be free, where they can do things they couldn’t do anywhere else.
— Tom Bradley

UK Film Releases | Friday 1st April 2011

It’s another big week here at the UK box office, with a whopping 7 new releases ranging from indie comedy Passenger Seat to animated adventure Hop. As Ken Loach sets up shop in Glasgow to cast his new feature, his son Jim Loach is hitting our screens after a successful awards season. Killing Bono reminds us that Irish cinema still has it while Sucker Punch is sucking it up with some less-than-favourable reviews. Most of all, we’re looking forward to our Pick of the Week, which sees our pal Jake Gyllenhaal alongside second-time director Duncan Jones in Source Code.

Hop

From the makers of Ice Age, Hop stars Russell Brand as the voice of E.B. – the teenaged son of the Easter Bunny. Rather than succumbing to pressures of running the family business, he dreams of becoming a rock star drummer. He befriends Fred (James Marsden), a slacker with big ambitions and, when all goes Pete Tong in E.B.’s home on Easter Island, they must join forces to save easter.

Big, brash movies are typically made by an army of highly intelligent folk who know exactly what they are doing at every step. The sadness is so much of it feels subsumed by focus group editing, lame in-jokes and an adherence to cliché that screams lowest common denominator, safety first filmmaking.
— Anwar Brett, Scoop Online

Looks suspiciously like a cack Santa flick in which the fat red guy’s been switched with a talking rabbit.
— Robbie Collin, News of the World

Killing Bono

A Dublin-based comedy about U2′s rise to fame, told from the perspective of their arch-rivals. Stars Ben Barnes and Robert Sheehan.

Like the late Pete Postlethwaite’s cameo (his final screen credit), alas, the messy, patchy and overlong result elicits more rueful sadness than side-splitting hilarity.
— Neil Smith, Total Film

[Their] hiccups are comical at first, but by the time we get to Neil turning down the chance to write for Rod Stewart or support U2 at one of their gigs, the fact he’s too proud or stupid to take the opportunities offered to him begins to grate. Serafinowicz adds sparkle as a flaky promoter, and Postlethwaite is touching in his final screen appearance.
— Paul Greenwood, Scoop Online

Sucker Punch

Watchmen director Zack Snyder returns with Sucker Punch, an action fantasy that takes us into the vivid imagination of a young girl (Emily Browning) whose dream world provides the ultimate escape from her darker reality. Locked up against her will, she bands together with four fellow young girls to fight for freedom.

Great on paper, dull in practice, this is less Moulin Rouge meets Sin City and more Powerpuff Girls meet The League Of Extraordinary Gentlemen. Proves that while masturbating over your cast may not make you blind, it can impair directorial vision.
— Catherine Bray, Film 4

Kudos to Snyder (who co-wrote the screenplay with Steve Shibuya) for letting his imagination run wild. It’s just a pity that imagination is so drastically circumscribed by the lurid “ho couture” culture of shoot-em-ups and soft porn.
— Tom Charity, CNN

Oranges and Sunshine

In Oranges and Sunshine, social worker Margaret Humphreys uncovers one of the most significant social scandals in recent times: the forced migration of children from the United Kingdom. Discovering a secret the British government had hidden for years, Margaret reunited thousands of families and brought authorities to account and worldwide attention to an extraordinary miscarriage of justice. Jim Loach tells the story in his directorial debut.

There is something about Hugo Weaving’s performance in Oranges and Sunshine that summarizes the film perfectly – mild, understated, slow to engage with, but ultimately, and without warning, powerful and heartbreaking.
— Tom Fordy, The Hollywood News

Like his father, Loach has made a film uncluttered by an obvious director’s stamp, peopled by sympathetic characters and driven by a desire to say something about the world without losing sight of human experience. In casting Watson, he’s also secured a performance that boldly lacks vanity while exuding a strength that leads you confidently through difficult, troubling terrain.
— Dave Calhoun, Time Out

Essential Killing

Vincent Gallo stars in this thriller from Polish director Jerzy Skolimowski. Following a man captured by American forces and transported to frozen European woodlands. To escape, he must kill everyone in his path. Essential Killing won the Special Jury Prize at Venice FIlm Festival.

Gallo, who was named best actor at this year’s Venice Film Festival, proves galvanizing without uttering a single word. Rarely has such strict physicality been used on screen to such potent effect.
— Gary Goldstein, LA Times

Arguably the most abstract chase film since Joseph Losey’s Figures in the Landscape, this is a furious, pared-down parable enriched by the Polish director’s sardonic understanding of man’s desperation forever alternating between prey and predator.
— Fernando F. Croce, Slant Magazine

Passenger Side

This indie comedy follows brothers Tobey and Michael (Adam Scott) on a road trip in search of the love of Tobey’s life. They get to know each other along the way, with odd places and wacky characters coming along for the ride.

Talk about making a virtue of your limitations: it’s a road movie set almost within one city, a romance where the love interest is off-screen and a moving family drama with no scenery-chewing showdown. What it has in spades is smart talk and tattered beauty…The faded hope of LA is perfectly captured, as is a depth of sibling love and resentment, with excellent performances, big laughs and emotional truth.
— Nev Pierce, Empire

If ultimately Passenger Side is a bitter pill to swallow, it is sweetened by the amiably bantering central performances, the hilariously caustic (and entirely credible) wit of the script, and by the perfect selection of songs on Michael’s retro mix tape… After all, even as some journeys change everything, others get you nowhere.
— Anton Bitel, Eye for Film

Pick of the Week: Source Code

In this sophomore film from Duncan Jones (Moon), Captain Colter Stevens (Jake Gyllenhaal) wakes up to find himself inside the body of an unknown man. He soon discovers he is part of a government experiment called the “Source Code”. Part of a mission to find the bomber of a Chicago Commuter train, Colter relives the incident during the final 8 minutes of the man’s life, piecing together the evidence of who is carrying out the attacks.

Those who inexplicably convinced themselves that Matt Damon and Emily Blunt had romantic chemistry in The Adjustment ­Bureau should check out true heat, courtesy of Gyllenhaal’s unblinking baby blues and Michelle Monaghan’s irrepressible glow. Dick would love the paranoid setup and probably hate the cheat of a denouement. But it all goes by too irresistibly fast to call a time-out for disbelief.
— David Edelstein, New York Magazine

Otherwise, it’s brilliantly constructed, going over an eight-minute cycle again and again with variations, each time advancing the plot — it may be that stories like these were inconceivable before choose-your-own-adventure books or computer games — but also bringing out the tragedy of a doom we are told is inescapable as the time-hopper makes different, deepening connections with the girl sitting next to him.
— Kim Newman, Empire

What are you off to watch at the cinema this weekend?

I am reminded of the professor who, in his declining hours, was asked by his devoted pupils for his final counsel. He replied, “Verify your quotations.”
— Winston Churchill

Quotations are notoriously tricky customers, and part of our mission here at Quotables is to allow you to upload and share your favourites, while making them easy-to-find with valid sources and providing a little bit of historical context. Here on the Quotables blog, we like to pick out the gems and show off everything Quotables has to offer.

Again and again we come across the same misquotations – well-remembered caveats and quips which, over time, have lost their authors or been united with the wrong ones. For example, did you know that Neil Armstrong meant to say, “That’s one small step for [a] man, one giant leap for mankind.”?

We’ve compiled some of the most common misquotations to give you a crash-course in quotable trivia.

Historic Misquotations

Let them eat cake!
— Marie Antoinette

These words first appear in Jean-Jacques Rousseau’s Confessions, his putative autobiographical work. However, there isn no record of them having been uttered by Queen Marie Antoinette. Rousseau says:

I recalled the makeshift of a great princess, who was told that the peasants had no bread, and who replied, “Let them eat brioche.”

“Let them eat cake” is the traditional translation of the French phrase “Qu’ils mangent de la brioche”, supposedly spoken by a French princess upon learning that the peasants had no bread. As brioche is a luxury bread enriched with eggs and butter, it would reflect the princess’s obliviousness to the nature of a famine.

In this world nothing is certain but death and taxes.
— Benjamin Franklin

This quote is often attributed to Mark Twain. Though he was known to use it, the earliest use of the saying is in a letter from Benjamin Franklin to Jean Baptiste Le Roy, dated 17 November 1789.

Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy.
— Benjamin Franklin

There is no question that Benjamin Franklin is a Quotables favourite for his wit and wisdom. Sorry, beer lovers. This quote, though inspired, seems to have stemmed from one about another tasty of alcoholic beverage:

Behold the rain which descends from heaven upon our vineyards, there it enters the roots of the vines, to be changed into wine, a constant proof that God loves us, and loves to see us happy.
— Benjamin Franklin

Film Folly

Beam me up, Scotty.
— Captain Kirk

“Beam me up, Scotty!” made its way into pop culture from Star Trek, becoming a is a catch phrase. It comes from the command Captain Kirk gives his chief engineer, Montgomery “Scotty” Scott, when he needs to be transported back to the Starship Enterprise. Though it has become irrevocably associated with the series and movies, the exact phrase was never actually spoken in any Star Trek television episode or film. However, it was used in an audio adaptation of novel The Ashes of Eden in 1995.

Play it again, Sam.
— Ilsa Lund, Casablanca

This line from Casablanca is frequently misquoted. While Sam is asked to play it again (As Time Goes By), neither Isla (Ingrid Bergman) nor Rick (Humphrey Bogart) utter the line.

Ilsa: Play it once, Sam. For old times’ sake.
Sam: I don’t know what you mean, Miss Ilsa.
Ilsa: Play it, Sam. Play “As Time Goes By.”
Sam: Oh, I can’t remember it, Miss Ilsa. I’m a little rusty on it.
Ilsa: I’ll hum it for you. Da-dy-da-dy-da-dum, da-dy-da-dee-da-dum…
Ilsa: Sing it, Sam.
— Ilsa Lund, Casablanca

Rick: You know what I want to hear.
Sam: No, I don’t.
Rick: You played it for her, you can play it for me!
Sam: Well, I don’t think I can remember…
Rick: If she can stand it, I can! Play it!
— Rick Blaine, Casablanca

 

We’re going to need a bigger boat.
— Chief Martin Brody, Jaws

This oft-quoted moment from Jaws, classically delivered by Roy Schneider, is popularly mis-spoken. What Brody actually tells the captain after taking an eyeful of the toothy fish is,

You’re going to need a bigger boat.
— Chief Martin Brody, Jaws

Don’t believe us? Here’s the clip. You’re welcome, film fans.

Elementary, my dear Watson.
— Sherlock Holmes

Though this line does not feature in any of Arthur Conan-Doyle’s Sherlock Holmes novels, it does appear in the film The Return of Sherlock Holmes (1929)

–

What are your favourite misquotations?

Here at Quotables, we’re always working on the next thing that will make your quote gathering and sharing experience better. Recently, we made several exciting projects that each explore new ways to interact with the quotes we love. You can take a quiz to see what you know about your favorite TV show characters, send a card to a loved one, join an intense debate, design your own instagram-style quote image, or even release a quote into the wild to inspire a stranger. These projects were extremely fun for us to make. We love the feedback we got, and we’re looking forward to finding new ways to delight others with the power of an awesome quote.

Now, what we really want to know is: what can we do for you? What new tools do you want? How do you want to be able to use your quotes through Quotables? What would you like to see more of? User feedback is hugely important to us, and we’d love to hear your ideas, please take a moment to select from the options in our simple poll:

Thanks for your feedback! You can also email us with your ideas, we’d love to hear from you. Your input helps us continue to give you the best possible online quoting adventure we can. Stay tuned for more awesome stuff from Quotables in the coming months.